Playing Juror Roulette

I got home yesterday and found myself in receipt of a jury summons.

I started reading all of the reasons that I might use to escape from this onerous (jk) civil duty. 

I could claim to be an alien.  Vulcan is taken and I lack the pointy ears.   Alderaan is out too.  Maybe Mars-I could claim to be upset at Eatrhlings depositing their space junk all over my planet.  Environmentalism is big these days.

I could claim that I am not eighteen years of age, but someone must have already done that as the disqualification specifically says “or older.”

I could claim that I am not currently residing in the county, but then I would have to decide what county I wanted to claim to be residing in…perhaps Boulder.

I could claim that I can’t read, speak, or understand English.  Aye, there’s the ticket.  All I need do is to find three folks who read what passes for a blog to sign an affidavit that much of what I write is unintelligible.  That should be easy.

I suppose that I could claim that I am too ill to participate.  That would take a supporting statement from a doctor.  Gee, I could probably manage that even though I feel perfectly fit.  Who knows how I will feel in a few weeks.

On the other hand, I could do nothing and play juror roulette.  My juror number is 698 for a Wednesday.  Most trials start on a Tuesday.  If memory serves, they take 36 prospective jurors per courtroom.  If everyone who got called goes, I would be in the 19th juror pool.  If only half go, I would still be in the 9th pool on an off day.

I’m going to play juror roulette.

Comments

[Teddy]

Hilarious. :) A few months ago I inadvertently played juror roulette myself - my father and I have the same name and live at the same address, but the summons failed to specify a suffix!